paint it black

A few weeks ago I was out wandering around the city and came across an art supply store. I ended up going in, and buying anything that drew my attention, even though I've only been to one painting class and have basically no artistic ability whatsoever.

I've been bringing them out and experimenting a bit lately and it's pretty fun. Maybe I'll never show them to anyone, and they are probably terrible, but maybe they will sit in my closet for years collecting dust and one day after I die someone will find them and the world will mourn that such an amazing talent wasn't recognized until it was too late.

No need to look so skeptical, that sort of thing happens all the time.

meet up

A few months ago I came across a website called Meetup.com. The basic premise of it is that it allows people to find other people with similar interests, and form groups around those interests.

There are so many different groups for people that love everything from reading, to chocolate, to wine, to motorcycles, to pub crawls, running, biking, photography, languages, etc. If you are looking for a group, chances are it already exists.

I thought it was a really great idea, especially in bigger cities, or places like the Bay Area where so many people are transient, and are looking to meet some new people. I immediately signed up for about 10 different groups, one for photography, one for running, a girl's night out club, a book club, and a chocolate club. Obviously.

I've met a lot of really fun, really nice people since I moved here, but most of them live in the city, and it's a bit of an ordeal for me to get home from the city after 8:00pm, so I figured it would be nice to meet some people my age, with similar interests, that live over where I live.

I've been to a few meets up so far, I was pretty nervous for the first one, it was at a girl's house in Oakland, at night, and I was going there alone, so basically the set up to every scary movie that's ever been made. It turned out to be really fun, I met a lot of nice girls, everyone brought something good to eat, that's how I was introduced to the amazing-ness that is the flour-less chocolate cake from Tartine, and there was lots of wine.

Last weekend I met up with some ladies for a Sunday morning brunch/ book club. I was a bit younger than the rest of the ladies there, but we had some really interesting conversations, and it's pretty neat how the most unlikely people can be brought together by the shared love of a good book. Also, I ordered eggs benedict and a mimosa. It was a good day.

I haven't been to meet ups for all of the groups I've joined, a lot of the time the date, location or times don't work out, but so far it's been a great experience. I'd like to keep finding new groups and going at least once in awhile because I really like to meet new people and try out different activities, especially when I'm a little bit scared to do it.

If you'd like to learn more about Meet Up, or find some groups in your area, check it out here.

starry night

This weekend I took a painting class in Oakland. Basically, each class has a famous painting that the teacher shows you how to recreate. I've always wished I was more visually artistic but I've never been able to draw, I have it on pretty good authority that my dogs always look like cows.

The class was actually really fun, it was nice to do something different, and I promised myself I would try to take more classes this year. What I didn't expect what that it was actually really peaceful and relaxing, I thought it would be stressful trying to do a good job, but since the likelihood of me actually recreating a Van Gogh painting perfectly was very small, it was just a fun activity.

I would love to do more painting in the future.

My colours

blank canvas

half way finished

done!

the instructor's recreation. ours are basically the same, right?

The Boots that Started It All

It's been over a year since I left my lovely little island to move to the Bay area (I still miss it every day!). I get restless very easily, and I love to travel and explore so when I found out we were moving, I was sad, but also very excited. California? Sure, that sounds like a good place to hang out for a bit. I don't know if I really realized I was LEAVING Hawaii and not coming back. As we slowly got settled here, and that realization started to dawn on me, I was definitely sad, maybe even depressed.

I couldn't work yet because I didn't have my work visa, I didn't have any family or friends, no classes, no home, nothing. It was very hard for me to meet people, or to warm up to the people I did meet, because stripped of the things that I used to identify myself (country, home, school, friends, family, work) I did not feel like myself, and I didn't want the people I met to know me the way I was then, but the way I was before. I remember thinking a lot of the time, "I bet you would really like me, if we ever met." This went on for a lot longer than it should have, even once I started working, and doing things for myself, getting out and exploring, I still felt like a friendless little orphan a lot of the time.
 

Then one day, I found The Boots.

Now a pair of boots, while I'm sure they can be stylish, comfy, even sensible if you get the kind that have steel toes, or keep your feet dry, but they don't have actual magical powers. These ones didn't either, but they did have something else. They were chunky black motorcycle boots, boots that I'd wanted for years, probably since the first time I saw Daria on MTV but I never bought them for myself because I didn't think I was someone who could pull them off.

I'd even told my quite a bit more stylish younger sister how much I wanted these boots, and she made fun of them, and I promptly realized she was right, and put them out of my head.  This has always been a recurring theme in my life, in all areas, but most easily noticeable when it comes to fashion. I've always loved fashion, and held a deep admiration for people who were able to wear anything they wanted and look stylish and effortless, but I have never personally felt that I was able to wear a lot of things, really for no other reason than I told myself I couldn't.
 

Fast forward to about a month after I had had my dreams of ever being Gemma Teller crushed mercilessly, and I was at the mall, in the Macy's shoe department, when I saw the same boots I had fallen in love with online. They were black, Steve Madden and completely gorgeous. They were also on sale. And they had one pair left in my size. Now I wouldn't say I am the most spiritual or intuitive person in the world, but I can take a hint.

I bought them immediately, put them on as soon as I got home, and proceeded to fall in love, while pointedly ignoring the obvious looks of disdain being directed at my feet by That One Guy (also known as my lovely husband Derek). I thought I would feel weird wearing them out of the house, or have trouble finding any of my clothing that would go with it, but they seemed to fit right in with me and my life, my new best friends I could wear on my feet.

What I realized then, was that whenever I am feeling orphaned or friendless (which I am not, I have the greatest friends in the world, they just happen to be scattered all over North America), I should try to appreciate the amazing opportunity I have to experiment with style, with hobbies, with eating, with fitness, with the people and things I spend time on. I have a completely clean slate to do anything I want to do. And while it sucks sometimes to be so far away from the people and things you love, I can take comfort in the fact that whether I leave the house in black motorcycle boots, a see-through white blouse, or ass-less chaps, nobody can judge me because nobody knows who I am.
 

Following this epiphany, I've really started to get into this really neat place where I've started living, and trying to make the most of my time here. I bought black leather leggings, and I love them every time I wear them. I bought a cheetah print cardigan, a peblum shirt, a leather skirt, a mini sweater dress, a mini cheetah print sweaterdress, blood red lipstick. I ran my first half marathon without my mom (she usually does the pacing, I thought I was going to die), I volunteered with Habitat for Humanity,  I started blogging.

I've taken an interest in eating healthier (except for chocolate, there will always be room for chocolate) and started experimenting with quinoa, kale and coconut oil. We took a road trip down the coast and stopped at every beach along the way to Carmel. I signed up for a writing class. We went to a free concert in Golden Gate Park, and watched the Giants with the NL championship surround by San Franciscans at a Haight Street bar.

I guess the point is, there is so much in life to do and so much to explore, it's better to focus on the things we can do, rather than the things we don't have. And if you're not sure who you are, or what you really want, there is no time like the present to find out.